Smitty burger VS. Oh Boy burger with a Celebrity Guest Appearance

     Noah brought 2 burgers over on the ark with him: The Smitty burger and the Oh Boy burger.  Everyone in Elyria has their favorite, so I teamed up with celebrity Vinny Mack Attack, and his facebook fiance, Kaila Marie to get to the bottom of this.  Warning: you may be offended by the results.  We went into this unbiased and open minded.  We didn't sugarcoat anything. There was one clear winner.

     Both burgers are a staple of the community.  Smitty's Place has been in Elyria over 75 years. Midway Oh Boy has been in Elyria over 60 years.  President Obama had a Smitty burger and Senator John McCain had an Oh Boy burger.  Both burgers have the same set up: 3 pieces of bread, 2 patties, 1 slice of cheese, lettuce and a special sauce.

Photos taken 5/1/14

     We roller-bladed to Smitty's place first, and ordered 3 Smitty burgers.  The Smitty burger seems to be the more popular burger so we indulged and stated our opinions.  Vinny mentioned, "With all the hype, I would expect more out of this than the Big Mac."  Kaila smashed her burger and voiced that she "Would like it better after consuming more beers."  We all discussed a slight disappointment and that we could only taste lettuce and sauce.  The legendary burger that we heard all about only had two tones: lettuce and sauce.  It was all hype and no show.

                 VMA gave it 5 out of 10 Flying Dragons      

Kaila Marie gave it 6 out of 10 Flying Dragons

                    I gave it 5 out of 10 Flying Dragons 

Smitty burger TOTAL AVERAGE   5.6

     After hitchhiking across town to Midway Oh Boy Restaurant, we ordered 3 Oh Boy burgers  If we ordered 1 more we would have had 4.  But we didn't.  Oh boy were they good!  Kaila said her teeth hurt so Vinny chewed the entire burger for her and put it in a cup so she could drink it. Chivalry is not dead. "It's a more well rounded burger" she said.  Then, Vinny observed that there was "More freshness to it".  I thought the burger itself tasted better, along with the bun, lettuce and sauce.  

          VMA gave it 8 out of 10 Flying Dragons

Kaila Marie gave it 7 out of 10 Flying Dragons 

                  I gave it 7 out of 10 Flying Dragons

Midway Oh Boy Burger TOTAL AVERAGE   7.3

     We have a clear victor!  Although Kaila said Smitty's has a better sauce, Vinny and I prefered the Oh Boy sauce.  But all 3 of us concluded a higher score for the Midway Oh Boy Burger.  Congrats to Midway Oh Boy burger!

Celebrity Guest Vinny Mack Attack's Bio and Credentials:

   Food Guru and Jesus look-alike, Vinny Mack Attack, was born during World War II, in a constipation camp in Nazi Germany, where they tested his cooking on prisoners who couldn't go potty.  He studied Culinary Arts at JVS. He knows all the words to a song.  He kidnapped a midget once.  He has been eating food for most of his life, which is why he was chosen for this burger battle.  

Celebrity Guest Kaila Marie's Bio and Credentials:

   Kaila was the first woman to break the gender barrier and ride a unicycle.  Without her, unicycling would still be considered a 'man's sport'.  She has chameleon hair, which changes colors based on how she feels. Her eyeglasses are actually made out of coke bottles.  She invented standing in line, and she actively fights for equal rights for left handed people.  Those unique attributes made her a perfect fit for Shart Attack's food review.

   

Basil's Grill and Tavern

     The first recorded taco party was in 1520.  I wasn't there, but I did take a trip to tacoland today.
     Good food is worth traveling for.  So today, Zeke and I went the extra mile.  Well, according to Google Maps, we went 2 miles.  Destination: Elyria's own Basil's Grill and Tavern to check out the 3 tacos for a $1.  We ordered 15 tacos and a pitcher of Pepsi because that's the cheapest route.  In order to receive the 3 tacos for $1, you have to purchase a drink along with the tacos.

   

6 of the 15 tacos 

     15 hard shells, filled with a decent portion of seasoned ground beef, shredded cheese, fresh lettuce, a few tomatoes and optional jalapenos later, we were both satisfied.  Basil's supplied us with large squirt bottles of taco sauce and sour cream to customize our tacos.  All together, the meal was... GOOD.  It definitely surpasses the over popular taco chain that made sharting so popular in the first place.   

     With a total bill of 11 dollars and some change, I felt great after stuffing my facehole with the Mexican inspired dish.  A 2 mile bike ride home and I didn't have a sore stomach, feel over-stuffed, or have the urge to vomit.  I felt quite nice actually.  We highly recommend stopping in at Basil's on Mondays for the taco special.

The total experience gets 6 out of 10 Flying Dragons.

Here is a picture of a micro pig!